ElfLord boosted

my parents, age 30: homeowners, children, career
me, age 30: i am a dog :)

ElfLord boosted

planning some heinous activities today (more posting)

ElfLord boosted

cut my knife into pieces
that was my best knife

ElfLord boosted
ElfLord boosted

@finn I’ll file a bug report on mastodon to get comic sans to happen.

ElfLord boosted

mastodon should be written in comic sans and you know it

ElfLord boosted

being THANKFUL is out, being COSMICALLY INSIGNIFICANT is in

ElfLord boosted

@starwall cracking open a cold one with the lads and staring at the stars together in mute wonder and confusion

ElfLord boosted

I was moving around in the kitchen so much I'm hatching pokemon eggs

ElfLord boosted
ElfLord boosted

how much math and physics do you think was required to find a solution for pooping in space that wasn't diapers

ElfLord boosted

why do I think that a set of grey sweatpants and grey sweatshirt is hot and why do I want one

ElfLord boosted

Oh look at me I'm an astronaut, coolest job ever *proceeds to poop into a vacuum cleaner*

ElfLord boosted
ElfLord boosted

"Why am I surrounded by religious weirdos?" - the citizens of a country founded by and for Europe's religious weirdos

ElfLord boosted

okay what i am okay with this year is people saying "fuck thanksgiving". what i was unprepared for was so many comments about actually fucking the turkey

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freedom.horse

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