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to the tune of 'band on the run' 

Thinking about a longsword, but glowing red hot. Awesome.

*slams my salad bowl down on the counter* SALAD ME UP

you wanna know my favourite food?

it's food. thank you.

Can't wait until I get a hundred more boosts so I can trade them in for a slide whistle and a keyring

Working a dead end minimum wage job sucks shit but then sometimes I remember I don't have to do homework anymore and that part rules at least

When Blink 182's Matt Skiba sang "I'M FEELING THIS"

I felt that

When I get out of bed I take one big bong rip and I hold it in, I keep holding it and only exhale before I go to bed, it gives me a nice buzz throughout the day

eminem shove his Fist at karl marx ๐Ÿ‘Š. Marx flinches but eminem just laughs

โ€œbro...pound itโ€

I bet I'd be fucking sick at using nunchuks if I ever got any

'work smarter not harder' i say as i ram my dick in the garbage disposal

boosted by eugen: 3 times
followed by eugen: 0 times
shit myself at Target: one hundred times

Getting to the pearly gates and Saint Peter begins to read out all my posts that didn't get any faves or boosts

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This is a place to go when you want FREEDOM. Get things off your chest. Share your secrets with strangers. Scream into the abyss. Tell filthy jokes. Make a joke at all. <3