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ElfLord boosted

goodnight everybody, don't think about mr. mime scuttling towards you on all fours

"I don't do it for the 'gram, I do it for the fans."

Is this anything?

So did they, (the scientists) ever figure out space or...?

ElfLord boosted
ElfLord boosted

i have far too many baby diapers it's kind of giving me an ego 😶

Your Christian name is the first name of an old sailor you once met and the word “Good” in front of the word “man”.

ElfLord boosted

food 

ElfLord boosted

My real first name is:

ElfLord boosted

food, heartbreak 

ElfLord boosted

@ElfLord My neighbors are tired of me printing out my toots and coming over in the middle of the night to show them.

food, heartbreak 

ElfLord boosted

I lie on here all day. That’s my job. And I barely ever even get paid for it.

ElfLord boosted

I have been giving myself honey baths as a spa treatment. I’m constantly getting stung by bees but pain is beauty.

My grandma is allergic to bee stings. So glad I’m not her.

ElfLord boosted
ElfLord boosted

nothing nothing nothing, systemd 

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freedom.horse

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