"The worst shitposter on Mastodon" - @nick
"You made that up, shut up" - @snakeboy
I should do big Texas hair and take a selfie and post it on here. I love big hair. Big hair, don't care.
calling out customer's names and clapping when they come to collect their to-go coffee
*slams face into a piano* that's JAZZ babey
hanny? lovely imo
(fighting the first person to wear a helmet) ah damn, he's got some kind of... metal hat
I love that there's #Brands on everything I own.
not to be dramatic but i would die for this boy
🎶 i keep my hole nice and freshi keep my hole nice and fresh 🎶
Wow, I just looked at my last poll and me putting milk in the ice cube trays at a wild party got 0%. People really don't like milk in the ice cube trays.
This weekend I'm going to a cabin with friends. Should be a pretty wild party. Which of the following should I do?
There should be an app that's the uber of drugs. Just my opinion.
It turns out buying cocaine is easier than literally anything else
Is there any software you like, or is it all shit?
remember when your teeth would fall out and people would be stoked
Oh shit, hold on, my trap phone's going off.
goodnight everybody, don't think about mr. mime scuttling towards you on all fours
"I don't do it for the 'gram, I do it for the fans."
Is this anything?
So did they, (the scientists) ever figure out space or...?
naming my kid Gob Lynn
i have far too many baby diapers it's kind of giving me an ego 😶
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