Engels predicted Real Life Superheroes, you heard it here first.
Who else liked Mutant Turtle Ninja Teenagers?
Surprised to find out that the Kaiser Chiefs song is called 'Ruby', not 'Lubey' - bit embarrassed after karaoke tbf
You have go drink NutraThirst™ before becoming truly awake, sheep.
If you can't handle me at my picking tortillas out of my fanny, you don't deserve me at my replacing floppy disks in my Macintosh
Ahhh the deadliest game of all: knife chess
Everyone's on about almond milk, but my fridge is full of maggot milk
Went out to take the bin for a walk and people are looking at me weird? What the fuck is with people these days I swear
Anyone else remember when Moses parted the M1 so the kids could walk through it?
Why did I choose the name ElfLord?? Why not SexHaver@freedom.horse
I've hardened a lot as I've aged. I don't think kids should get school holidays anymore. In fact, I think all kids should just go straight to prison.
Why isn't this site called mastodon.com
You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the dentist
You can't spell motherfucker without moth.
I got so stoned I forgot Tony Blair's face
Off to get my grocery shopping at B&Q, hope they have that new flavor of drill bits
The boils are back in town!
This is a place to go when you want FREEDOM.
Get things off your chest. Share your secrets with strangers. Scream into the abyss. Tell filthy jokes. Make a joke at all. <3