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begging :( Show more

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hey for real if any of you live in or pass by st louis, please let me know. i'd very much like to hang out!!

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But What Can Following Zoey Get *Me*?

great question. following zoey on mastodon unlocks the following features:

• Updates when Zoey is horny, stoned, or both

• Constant information about Zoey, as provided by Zoey

• A weird amount of selfies

• Insecurity about probably being a furry

• Buckets of blood mailed to your home

• Bic pen slash fic on request

• envelopes of blood under your pillows

• owls flying into your home dropping an m80
strapped to a blood balloon

• spotify playlists

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intro post:
i'm the tiger-riding queen of a dark skeleton army and i live in a spiral tower

🎵 One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop this time
One hop thi

religion, silly nonsense Show more

also if you faved that one post where i said i'd give my opinion of you, please don't feel bad! i just haven't like, been sitting around idle since then, and kinda paranoid someone may have been like "wow i'm not even worth considering"

i bet there's a really interesting story behind how hats when from a standard part of your wardrobe to basically an affectation

Divorce me once, shame on you. Divorce me twice, I'm joining a toxic subreddit.

millennial bashing Show more

hootsuite

from hell's heart i stab at thee

Haircut today! Haircut today! 🦒💇🏻‍♀️💖

millennial talk Show more

Thinking about spending my weekends dressed up like a ghost and haunting the big estates that keep going up for sale sound town, so the property values will go down and my millennial friends can buy their own houses finally

millennial talk Show more

millennial bashing Show more

when cats STRETCH the toes whilst cleaning themselves. please boost if u agree.

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freedom.horse

This is a place to go when you want FREEDOM.

Get things off your chest. Share your secrets with strangers. Scream into the abyss. Tell filthy jokes. Make a joke at all. <3